you know when you know you're going to kill yourself one day so there's no point getting into a relationship and traumatizing someone? that's how i've been living my life the past 5 years. i wonder when i'll finally do it. what will be the tipping point? how much longer can i deal with this shit life before i finally end it? i think about this every day. i don't talk to anyone about it. i can't. it's pretty much illegal to talk about committing suicide. when i talk about it i have to be very clear that i'm not in the middle of committing suicide RIGHT NOW or they'll send cops to get me. what a fucked up situation. i can't talk about the one thing that is hurting me the most because i'm afraid of being caged by cops and doctors who don't give a fuck about me. i wonder how many other people out there are suffering like this, in this same way, who also can't talk about it because they're afraid of backlash? it's beyond fucked up.

LiliDragon?

Sounds like it What a sad individual.

Me either *shrug*

Why do you want to kill yourself?

why not?

C'mon. That isn't an answer. That is a question. Tell me why?

no one loves me.

What do you do to meet people? What are you involved in?

i have met thousands of people in hundreds of different places doing hundreds of different things, and none of them give a shit about me. thanks.

why do you think that is? do you love you? can you address that? make yourself more lovable?

i love myself, thanks.

you really need a better reason than that

so do it, Lili, ya big tease

I felt just like that until I saw my doctor and got on some meds that actually make me feel like a normal person. It's the best feeling in the world.

ah. meds. meds are not the answer. love is the answer. and there's none of that in the world as far as i can tell. or at least, none in my life.

meds may not be the answer but they will help you find the true answer

if you can't love yourself you cant love another

please explain that logic.